Self-compassion and Body Image During the Holidays
This time of year can challenge our body image and can generally be a tricky time for MANY reasons. Our coping mechanisms might be withering due to general holidays stressors and then we are inundated with reminders about our body and surrounded by lots of food (and lots of people’s opinions about both).
As someone who has many years of disordered eating under my belt, there were many Thanksgivings where I would start the morning running 3-6 miles in the Turkey Trot and then bring my own vegetable side dishes to relieve the anxiety I experienced around eating and the repercussions of “getting fat.” I am in a FAR different place than those years but I know many people struggle this time of year, and I’d be lying if the voice in my head didn’t still make a regular appearance.
There is a heightened sense of self-awareness around bodies in our society which has many, many layers in the making, including emphasis on appearance from media - and with LOTS of people making money off of our insecurities.
Maintaining a neutral or positive body image during this time can be incredible helpful (and difficult). That’s why I wanted to take time to offer insights and practical tips to offer foster a more joyous and accepting time of year.
Eating pie guilt free without having to exercise for hours is SO MUCH more fun!
Avoid food and body talk
Well-meaning comments about appearance and weight run rampant this time of year and can unexpectedly make you feel like shit about yourself It is absolutely necessary to set clear boundaries and communicate your needs assertively when this occurs. Redirecting the conversation and practicing helpful self-talk can really go a long way in coping with these kind of comments
Remind yourself that these comments often stem from their own insecurities and have nothing to do with your. This can shift your perspective and minimize the impacts of these comments on your self-esteem.
The holiday season is about so much more than how you look. Focus on experiences, connections, and special moments that make this time of year special.
Keep your eyes on your own plate - concentrate on mindful eating
The plethora of festive foods can be unsettling if you’re already struggling with your body image. Mindful eating can be super helpful when enjoying indulgent meals - something that I’ve really had to focus on myself. This means taking time to savor each bite, tuning in to hunger cues, and working towards a more balanced relationship with food.
Treat yourself with kindness and self-compassion while practicing mindful eating. Be gentle with yourself You are deserving of love and acceptance, regardless of your appearance.
When negative self-talk creeps in (because it will!), challenge those thoughts with this self-compassion. Treat yourself with understanding, support, and encouragement.
Click here to read more about incorporating self-compassion.
No more moralizing
As yummy and delicious as holiday food can be, there’s frequently a feeling of guilt around indulgence this time of year. It’s really easy to fall back into the obsessions counting calories and avoiding foods you normally don’t eat because they are “bad for you” or “fattening.” See - cinnamon rolls, candies, pie and CARBS….OH MY!
If you’ve ever used the words “good” or “bad” to describe food, then you’ve given it moral value. Food has no moral value. It’s just food. Moralizing comes from perceived health or societal standards that have been placed on food - i.e. “clean” eating, wellness, keto, etc. This can lead to feelings of shame and guilt with food and eating. To move past this way of thinking, embrace non-judgmental eating.
A helpful place to start is to reject diet rules and begin to be mindful and listen to your body’s hunger cues. Eat a variety of foods for nourishment rather than associating them with “good” or “bad” - “guilt” or “virtue.” Neutralizing your relationship with food fosters a healthier mindset and provides immense release of stress and anxiety with eating.
Set boundaries with loved ones
This is a time of ALL the engagements, parties, invitations and obligations. Prioritizing your own well-being and setting numerous invitations and obligations. It's essential to set boundaries and prioritize self-care during this time.
Decline invitations and focus on the celebrations that genuinely bring you joy. Take time for self-care activities, such as reading, playing video games or taking a walk.
Include activities that are food-free
Instead of only centering gatherings around food, sprinkle in fun activities for everyone. Think - game nights, movie marathons, or crafting sessions.
Engaging in activities fosters a sense of togetherness and promotes positive memories, without the focus being solely on eating or appearance.
Use physical activity to feel good, not as punishment
Use physical activity in ways beyond weight managements - because there really are SO MANY other benefits. It can boost your mood, reduce stress, and help you feel good in your body. A brisk walk, a short little dance session, or a hitting the mat for a yoga flow can bring joyful moments of movement that will help you feel better physically and mentally.
Social pressures around body image
Photo ops are constant this time of year with all the gatherings and festive celebrations. These moments can land you on social media platforms whether you give permission or not bringing heightened awareness of your body image knowing you will potentially be more exposed out on the internet. In a world where filters and all the edits reign, it's super, super easy to begin to feel insecure or inadequate. Each person's body is unique and hand limitless beauty that goes beyond preconceived ideals around how you should look physically.
Bottom Line
As the holidays approach - it’s time to double down on your self-acceptance practices. I hope this season is a time for you to commit to accepting your body with gratitude.
Body neutrality is a process - remember to acknowledge and validate your feelings and practice self-compassion. Wear what makes you feel good and remember all the things your body allows you to do outside of how it looks.
Therapy can help
If you feel like you’re getting stuck along the way or want more guided support, it may be time to seek a consultation with a therapist. Contact Real Well Therapy here or call 512-686-7009.
Want to learn more about how anxiety therapy can help you? Click here!
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Disclaimer: the information provided in this blog post is for educational purposes only and should not be construed as medical advice or a substitute for professional consultation. If you are experiencing emotional distress, please reach out to a qualified mental health professional.
